A Royal Affair
by BeneathTheUmbrella
Summary: A royal baby is born.


_So, after the Princess of Cambridge was born yesterday, I realized she was born around the same time as Penny Mosby in my fic universe. So I figured a new story was in order. This is pure fluff (isn't that always the case?), so enjoy!_

* * *

Ted poured himself a cup of coffee in the kitchen, yawning heavily as he put the carafe back in its holder. He smiled sleepily as he lifted the hot cup in his hands, taking a whiff of the strong yet comforting aroma. Coffee always smelled best at 6:30 in the morning.

He shuffled over to where Tracy was sitting on the couch, gently sitting down next to her, where their three-day old daughter was dozing in her arms. She stared at the coffee longingly, making a face; Tracy was seriously regretting her vow to not drink coffee until Penny was three months old.

Ted and Tracy had only gotten back to the apartment the day before, having spent two nights in the hospital. Everything was calm and serene at first—despite entering the world two weeks early, Penny was in perfect health—the baby pretty much in-and-out of sleep for the most part, eating and pooping in between. The moment the three of them arrived home, however, was when Penny started to get a bit fussy. Lots of crying when she was awake, which was every couple of hours when she needed a feeding.

And it was at that moment that they decided to hibernate just the three of them for a week or two. They didn't want to overstimulate Penny, to have too many visitors and too many pairs of hands asking to hold her. Ted and Tracy both agreed to have that time to bond with her, and for the baby to get to know her parents as well, to recognize their respective features, their sounds, their scents. Much to the chagrin of their family and friends, of course; Tracy's parents only respected their choice reluctantly, and Ted had to convince his mom to not book a plane ticket to New York City for a couple of weeks.

But the new parents were happy with their decision, with most of their loved ones having had the opportunity to meet and hold the baby at the hospital anyway. Now, it was their turn. Plus, given Tracy's exhaustion and pain, Ted wanted to give her the time to rest and heal, too.

Besides, given their home was practically a shirts-optional environment at this point, it was best there weren't any visitors.

"Jerk," she now said (half) jokingly as he took a slow and exaggerated sip of his morning elixir.

"Yeah, but you love me anyway," he said, then extending the mug over to her, letting her take a sip of it. They were both so damn tired; a boost of caffeine—especially for Tracy—was needed.

"Now that you've shared your coffee, yeah, you're back in my good graces," she agreed, looking down at the baby and then back up at him pointedly. "You know, after putting this kid in me and then forcing me to push her out."

He chuckled, and leaned forward to kiss her. "It's a good thing you're not holding that against me or anything," Ted teased against her lips. He looked down at Penny and gently ran a finger down her cheek; her eyes closed, Penny reacted to his touch, turning her head in his direction, her tiny mouth open.

 _Shit, I'm a dad_ , he thought in wonder as she moved. That thought popped into his mind, oh, every 10 minutes or so, since the moment she was born.

"Nah, you're forgiven," she said softly, looking down at their daughter, probably having those same thoughts as he, awe and wonder evident on her features. "You're lucky she's so damn perfect."

"She really is," he breathed out in agreement.

They sat there for a little while, enjoying the little breathing and cooing noises Penny was making. They just revelled in one another's company, as well as in the silence, appreciating the moments when the baby wasn't crying her eyes out.

"Hey, can you turn on CNN?" Tracy finally asked. "I just want to get an update on the Baltimore situation."

Ted nodded and set down his coffee, grabbing the remote. Tracy had been disconnected from the events in the news since she went into labor, but the community unrest was something close to her heart—a topic not something only seen on the news, but a reality she saw through her work on a daily basis.

"The rally isn't until later today," he told her as he turned on the TV and switched channels to the news. There wasn't any Baltimore discussions happening; however, there was another bit of breaking news on the screen before them: it seemed a royal baby girl had been born.

"Hey!" Ted said happily, turning to face Tracy. "The Princess of Cambridge has been born! Do you know what this means?"

"We move to London, sign Penny up to private school, she becomes BFFs with the princess, and then tells the story of how she knew the future Queen of England when? And you get to hob-nob with royalty at hoity toity parties?" Tracy offered.

"Hey, I'm not _that_ much of a pretentious douche..."

"No, but you'll find any excuse to wear a monocle and quote T. S. Eliot to someone," she teased lovingly.

"Fair enough," he conceded. "But what I meant was, we beat the royals by _three_ days!"

"Yeah, we did!" she cried in agreement, lifting her palm up. Ted did the same and pressed his against hers. The slap of their palms seemed to startle Penny, who let out a cry and arched her back, tiny arms and legs extending and retracting.

"Crap," Ted whispered, hovering over the baby.

"It's okay." Tracy murmured soothing, apologetic words at the baby, snuggling Penny closer to her body. The baby settled down quickly. "It's not a competition, though," Tracy continued.

"Obviously not," Ted said. "But our daughter's definitely cuter and more awesome."

" _All_ children are beautiful," Tracy chided. "Plus, you haven't seen this baby yet. She could be gorgeous. She has royal genes, you know."

"May I remind you, those genes also include Prince Charles," he reminded her, which garnered an appreciative chuckle out of Tracy's lips. "Besides, _our_ daughter is gorgeous. My princess..." He pressed his lips against the baby's fuzzy head.

Ted then turned to look over at Tracy; he was also pretty lucky to have the most perfect partner by his side for all this. He had always dreamed of kids, yes, but that never meant a thing if he didn't have someone with him along for the ride. He recalled the time he and Barney had the crazy idea to adopt a baby together as bros. And he also remembered James' words from back then, that he was so glad he waited to meet Tom to have kids instead of following through on an arrangement with a female friend; it really stuck with Ted. It had been long and arduous road, yes, but well worth the wait to meet the right person to have children with. He couldn't imagine doing this with anyone else.

"My queen," he murmured, leaning forward to press his forehead to hers, the soothing, new baby smell permeating their little huddle. Tracy reached a hand up to cup his cheek, stroking it gently.

"And you're my... Court Jester," she said, her small smile widening into a large grin, her eyes, playful.

Ted pulled away. "Seriously?" he asked in mock-offense. "You're not promoting me to king? Not even an Earl or a Duke or something?"

"But kings are so dour!" she explained. " _You_ make me laugh, hence Court Jester. And you have a Ren Faire costume that goes with the position, so..."

"I'd be happy to put it on, _Your Highness_ ," he offered. "See if we can make this little girl laugh."

"That won't happen for another few months, but you _can_ wear it for _my_ amusement."

"Later, I promise," he vowed, leaning against the back of the sofa. "For now, I'm just too tired to get off this couch."

"It's a good thing we don't have anywhere to be," Tracy agreed, handing over the baby to Ted. He accepted her eagerly, bringing her close to his bare chest. "Save for the couch, the bed, or the bathroom. Speaking of which..." She began to get up off the couch, grimacing as she moved and stood on her feet.

"Need help?" he asked, concern in his voice.

She waved her hand dismissively. "I'm alright," she assured him. "You just send a photo of Penny to my mom; I promised I'd send three per day, or else she'll come charging to see her in person." She disappeared into the bathroom and shut the door behind her.

Ted looked back down at Penny again, and reached next to him for his phone.

The tiny little apartment was _their_ kingdom, he mused. It may not be as big as Kensington Palace or anything, but being in the same boat as the Duke of Cambridge right then—new baby and, thus, a rush of emotions coursing through him—he knew their home was filled with just as much love. And that was enough.

"Baby's first selfie," Ted said to himself, adjusting the camera on his phone and smiling at Penny, who was fully asleep now. "Let's do this, honey. Smile for your nonna!"

 _Click!_


End file.
